Greetings fellow travelers and welcome to the tenth posting of volume four of the Blog. Hard to believe that we are 11 weeks into the year and it is already action packed. 2013 is not gonna be a quiet year in history. People are gonna remember this one. As usual, the Blog this week has non-fiction as well as Oddley's continuing story from 1968. Well, this is the week of the conclave. 115 people from around the world gathered inside the Sistine Chapel, with the task of selecting the new pope.
Tuesday saw the 115 cardinals gather inside the Chapel after a morning of prayer. Once inside, the meaning of the word "conclave", "with key", came to pass as the doors were locked and everyone got down to the business of electing the 266th leader of the Roman Catholic Church. As night fell over Rome, all eyes turned to the chimney upon the roof. Sure enough, smoke came out... and it was black, no pope. It was just the first vote, so no one was surprised. As the day came to an end, the air was filled with tension.
Day two of the conclave began with a nice breakfast and being locked away in the Sistine Chapel again. The first two rounds of voting that day happened during the morning. Before noon local time, black smoke emerged from the chimney. No pope yet. Then the next two round occurred. The first round was no good, for the lack of smoke. However, at 7:00 pm local, after the four and final vote of the day occurred, it happened. White smoke emerged from the chimney on the roof of the Sistine Chapel, telling all there is a new pope in town
An hour later, said new pontiff was revealed to the world and the world couldn't believe it. Cardinal Mario Bergoglio of Argentina had been elected by the conclave as Pope Francis I. He is the first non-European pope since Gregory III from Syria in the 8th century and the first pope ever from the new world. He is also the first Jesuit pope, taking his regal name from that most famous of saints Francis of Assisi. The Jesuits mean something to me, for one of their own, Father Marquette, is one of the early heroes of Michigan. He would be happy that one of his own now leads the Roman Catholic Church.
An hour later, said new pontiff was revealed to the world and the world couldn't believe it. Cardinal Mario Bergoglio of Argentina had been elected by the conclave as Pope Francis I. He is the first non-European pope since Gregory III from Syria in the 8th century and the first pope ever from the new world. He is also the first Jesuit pope, taking his regal name from that most famous of saints Francis of Assisi. The Jesuits mean something to me, for one of their own, Father Marquette, is one of the early heroes of Michigan. He would be happy that one of his own now leads the Roman Catholic Church.
Well, with the important news of the week out of the way, time to head back to 1968 Peoria and Oddley's story. I think it's fair to go back to the old title of "The Life of Oddley" as it sums up a lot about the story below. It is being told by one man, who tells me he's lived an interesting life. The story he's telling now is just a small sample from his archives. If you like, he will share more of it but only if you tell me. The comments are below. Just write down your thoughts on Oddley's journey so far.
To recap, Oddley is on a strange vacation. In fact, he didn't wanna take it. A potion's effects on his sister forced him on his trip by making him hide in a car belonging to a housewife who runs away. The trip becomes awkward for the two until an agreement is struck. Then, while re-fueling in Peoria, Oddley is run over by a car driven by his best friend. The best friend then takes to a house, where a split personality lives. The alter invites the gang to stay there for a while, which is where our story picks up...
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Tuesday morning arrived without a sound. I just knew it was a Tuesday for yesterday had been the strangest Monday in my life. I had started it in my bed in Chicago and ended it on a couch in a house in Peoria. What 12 hours can do to a man. Anyway, I did open my eyes as the sun roses over the horizon.
My mind was shaken by my dream that night. I dreamt that I had made it back to Chicago. Things were normal at first. I was at work, where I saw Gilda, just working away stacking cans in the same way that I did when I first met her a couple of weeks ago, before this whole thing even started.
"It feels good to be back." I said to her as I walked up.
"I know it. Did your trip go well?" said Gilda.
"As well as can be expected." I said.
"How was Peoria?" she asked.
"Fine. It was a nice city." I said.
"That's nice to hear." she said as she moved off.
What is Oddley's idea? What does the nympho-drops have to do with it? As usual, the answer lies in next week's episode of "The Life of Oddley". It's been a fine story so far but hold on tight as the story takes more turns than a confused taxi cab driver on a hot day. Well, I've run out of things to say this week, so I will conclude this week's posting with a riddle. When someone sneezes, we say "God bless you". When God sneezes, what does He say? Think about it.
Join us next week, won't you?
Yours truly, John Maxwell.
Your Fellow Traveler.
I then moved on. I decided to scan the aisles before learning what job I had at the store that day. The first aisle I visited was normal. It was full of people, getting items and such. There was a whining child and his nervous mother as they fought over an item that he wanted but she didn't.
As I rounded the corner into the next aisle, I saw it. It was the bloodied body of Newshaw, laying stiff, face-down, in the middle of the aisle. I ran over to it and checked for a pulse but found none. He was dead, all right. The question was: what killed him. I looked the body over and found where the blood was coming from.
It was coming from his midsection. I looked around a bit before I turned him over. There, I saw a horrible sight. I can't describe it fully, but let's just say that a certain organ, common to all males, was torn to bits and/or missing. The mystery deepened for me as I looked down at the awful sight.
I then heard footsteps behind me. Slowly, I turned around and saw that it was my sister, but not the way she should be. Instead, it was the thing that had forced me to leave Chicago, but much more than what I saw then. It was a pure monster, with evil eyes and large muscled frame, staring at me.
I could tell that there was only one lone thought on her mind, and it was that thought that had killed Newshaw dead. Quickly, I ran down the aisle away from her but she gave me chase, just like last time. I threaded my way through the aisles, ever thinking of the idea that this time, running wouldn't help me.
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I had only one option: the front door. Quickly, I ran as fast I could to the front door. When I got there, I saw my sister, pacing back and forth like a lion, waiting for its dinner to arrive. I was trapped, and there was no way. I tried to run away but I ran into the cans that Gilda was stacking before and made another discovery. It was Gilda, and she, too, was dead. This time, anything sexual on her was gone and she was just a dead body.
The monster-Susan heard the crash and raced towards me. I grabbed some cans and threw them at her, but she just ate them. She pounced onto me and was about to cut into me when I heard it. It was the ringing of an alarm clock. My eyes sprung open and I was back in Lisa and Rita's living room, sleeping on the couch. I looked around and saw the thing causing the noise. I shut it off and then realized that it wasn't there last night. Rita must have put it there after I'd dozed off.
Anyway, I was shook up from said dream and needed a fix... of coffee that is. I got off that couch and began walking to the kitchen. However, halfway there, I realized that I hadn't toured the house yet. Rita hadn't offered it and I hadn't asked for it. I felt that this was as good a time as any. Anything was better than that dream.
I walked quietly up the stairs. Once I reached the top, I began looking around. . I looked into one and saw that it must be Lisa's room, due to the decor. It was covered in little furnishings, except for a bed, bedside table, make-up table, and three chairs. There, sleeping in the bed, was the frame of Wanda Lee, dressed in a wife's nightgown. I quickly walked away without making a sound.
I looked into the second room on my search and discovered Rita's room. Her room was covered in splendor. Colorful paint filled the walls. The furniture within was the best one could get around here. The bed alone was classic 19th century sleeping place, with frills and bows all around it. Inside the bed, under lace covers, was the sleeping Ogden and Rita.
I was quick to get back down stairs. I was when I reentered the kitchen and saw Rita that I remembered why I had left the kitchen so fast in the first place. She was just starting to make the food and I just sat down and kept my eyes on the cereal bowl as I finished eating.
Once finished with eating, I decided to once again make my leave. This time, I retreated back to my sofa/bed. As I sat there, I decided to turn on the television and watch some shows. However, the only thing that was on was the morning news. I turned it off and was about to give the kitchen another try when I saw it.
The two were intertwined in each other's arms. I could see that the two were enjoying the pleasure of sleeping in the same bed. Let me remind you that in 1968, an unwed couple sharing a bed would never have been shown on television. To see it in real life was, therefore, quite a treat. I then retreated my way down the stairs and continued my path to the kitchen.
A quick bowl of cereal became my breakfast as 8:00 am arrived. From upstairs, I heard a beautiful ring, the sound of Rita's alarm clock. I ate my cereal slowly, as I always do, to let it one bite settle before the next one, and also to think. I thought how long before Odgen and Rita would head downstairs, barring any early morning loving, if you catch my drift.
As I reached the halfway point of my cereal, I heard footsteps from upstairs. From my spot, I heard two sets of footfalls, telling me it was Ogden and Rita. I hadn't heard Wanda Lee's alarm go off, if she had set it at all. The footfalls reached the stairs and quickly ran down them. It wasn't long before the footfalls arrived in the kitchen with Ogden and Rita and my eyes almost left their sockets.
I saw that Rita was wearing a nightie, but not a normal one. I was that it was a mini-skirted type of nightie, complete with lace trim. Another thing about it was that it was see-through. In a way, it was like she wasn't wearing it. The morning sun wasn't helping by shining light through the thing, showing everything. Ogden himself was wearing an old silk robe, complete with a hankerchief tucked away.
"Good morning, Oddley. Sleep well?" asked Ogden.
"As well as can be." I said.
"That's good to hear." said Rita.
"Say, dear, why not get started on breakfast?" asked Ogden.
"A nice meal, coming right up." said Rita as she began prancing around the room, gathering things.
"So, Oddley, how was the couch?" asked Ogden as he took a seat at the table.
"It was... good enough." I said after a pause of a few seconds.
"That's good to hear." he said.
"Now, can I ask you about your night?" I said.
"I was nice to finally spend a whole night with Rita." he said.
"Do tell." I said.
"We just made passionate love and slept it off." he said.
"Let me guess, there's nothing under that robe." I said as a joke.
"Not a thing. The silk feels nice." he said.
"I didn't wanna know that. I was joking." I said.
"Then don't say it, Oddley." he said.
"I wonder when Wanda Lee will wake up." I said.
"Why don't you check up on her?" said Rita.
"That's a good idea. I'll go do that." I said as I bolted from the kitchen.
I was glad to leave. Rita's nightgown was raising my blood pressure and my heart rate. My run got me to the stairs before I stopped. I calmed down a bit and reminded myself of my new task at hand. I walked up the stairs and made a bee-line for Wanda Lee's room. As I entered, I saw that she was still sleeping in the bed.
I tip-toed slowly to the bed but before I could reach it, the alarm clock did go off. I checked my watch and it said 8:30 am. I watched as Wanda Lee stirred from her slumber. I quickly retreated to a safe distance as she rose in the bed to greet the day. She had a smile on her face, which lasted until she spotted me hiding in a corner of the room.
"What are you doing here?" she asked.
"Rita's making breakfast. She asked me to check on you." I said.
"Tell her that I'm fine and I'll be down in a few minutes." she said.
"Right." I said as I darted from the room.
Once finished with eating, I decided to once again make my leave. This time, I retreated back to my sofa/bed. As I sat there, I decided to turn on the television and watch some shows. However, the only thing that was on was the morning news. I turned it off and was about to give the kitchen another try when I saw it.
It was an old radio, one of those giant things that ran on vacuum tubes and such. I got up from the sofa and walked over to it. I studied it for a moment and then, like most people, decided to turn it on. I fumbled for a moment until I found the dial and turned it. After a minute of warming up, sound finally came on its speaker. Just my luck, it was a station broadcasting a classical music piece.
I turned the dial, searching the airwaves. Finally, I heard it. It was the voice of another Wanda: Wanda Jackson. She was singing "Tears Will Be The Chaser for Your Wine". I went back, not to the sofa, but to a neighboring easy chair and sat down. There, I listened to my music of choice: country music. The radio just filled the room with the sound of steel guitars and fiddles.
"Don't tell me you listen to that stuff." said Wanda Lee as she came down the stairs in a nice yellow blouse and green capri pants as the radio was playing "The Cold Hard Facts of Life" by Porter Wagoner.
"What do you mean, the song or the music?" I asked her as she reached the bottom of the stairs.
"I mean the music. I thought you're from Chicago." she said.
"I am. I just happen to like country music." I said.
"How can a city boy like you like that hick stuff?" she asked.
"My mother came from the south and I happen to enjoy the music." I said.
"I know for a fact there isn't a country radio station in Chicago." she said.
"One day there will be. For now, all I have is listening to WSM at night and the record store." I said.
"I just don't understand you, Oddley. The way you do things." she said.
"If you think the music isn't up to your standards, wait until you see Rita's nightgown." I said as Rita herself entered the doorway.
"Wanda Lee, I see you're up. Breakfast will be ready in just a few minutes." said Rita before she retreated back into the kitchen.
"I could see everything under that nightgown." said Wanda Lee.
"You're not the only one." I said.
For the next few minutes, me and Wanda Lee just sat there in the living room, listening to the country station. The radio played some of the greatest songs along with songs that litter record collections, including mine. Finally, as the radio was playing "I Don't Wanna Play House" by Tammy Wynette, that Rita issued the call to eat.
All of us were gathered at the breakfast table, eating the delightful meal Rita had made for us. It was just as tasty as her dinner. However, unlike dinner, this meal had an additional treat: Rita's nightgown. I tried to keep eating as well as I did the previous night. Finally, my mind was unable to push the image of Rita in said nightgown out of my mind.
"Excuse me, Rita?" I said.
"Yes, Oddley?" she replied.
"Can I say something?" I asked.
"Go right ahead." she said.
"Okay. What is with you and that nightgown?" I then asked.
"Is there somthing bothering you about my nightgown?" she asked me.
"The fact that the way the sunlight is hitting it, you might as well not be wearing it. That's what bothering about it." I said.
"I happen to like that nightgown." said Ogden.
"That's understandable from you. What about you, Wanda Lee?" I said.
"I think... it's a little too revealing for my tastes." she replied.
"Wanda Lee, I think your style needs help there." said Rita.
"What do you mean?" she asked.
"I mean, that outfit there just says housewife to me." said Rita.
"I am a housewife." said Wanda Lee.
"I thought the point of your little trip here was to find yourself." I said.
"It is. However, I wouldn't be caught dead in that thing." she said.
"Let's just drop it." said Ogden.
"You know, Rita, I think you have a nice... shade of skin." I said.
"For a moment there, I thought you were gonna say chest." she said.
"That's a nice part of her." said Ogden.
"I think I'll just stay quiet and eat my breakfast." I said.
And quiet I stayed. Breakfast was finished and Rita was quick to run off to the bedroom to get changed for the day. I still couldn't believe that Rita would go to school in Lisa's stead and no one would notice the change. I guess when you can pass yourself off as someone else when you "are" someone else half the time, you can pull it off.
It took five minutes between the end of breakfast and the time Rita returned downstairs. When she came down stairs, we all gathered at the bottom. As I looked, the outfit she had on wasn't different from the one she wore yesterday. It was another red turtleneck. However, this one had a nice dark blue skirt and same color fringe vest. The only thing that the same for Lisa was the turtleneck.
"Wait a minute, I thought you said you dressed like Lisa when you went to teach." I said to her.
"I do. The only thing different is the vest here. I think it makes this thing stylish." she replied.
"Have a nice day teaching." I said as Rita walking to the door.
"Have a good day, honey." said Ogden as he followed behind.
"Same to you, my darling companion." she said as she reached the door.
"A kiss, my dear?" he asked.
"Of course." she said, giving him one.
"See you this afternoon." he said as she opened the door.
"Same here." she said as she walked out and closed the door behind her.
"Now what?" asked Wanda Lee.
"That's a good question." I said.
"I usually just sit around all day." said Ogden.
"You mean you've been here for a week and you haven't gotten a job yet?" I said with confusion.
"I can't risk that farmer finding me. He probably has every farmer in the state looking for me." he said.
"I doubt that. Lisa must ask you to go find work." I said.
"She does. However, I don't see any point." he said.
"Why not?" I asked.
"Because Lisa and Rita bring in the money. Why should I be the breadwinner?" he said.
"After all those years, Susan's feminism finally gets to you." I said.
"Oddley, if you wanna do something else, you're welcomed to it." he said.
"Come, let us to the sofa to ponder our day's activities." I said, leading the way.
"While you guys think, I'm gonna go sit in the kitchen and think of something I can do." said Wanda Lee as she left the room.
Me and Ogden sat on the sofa for it seems like an eternity. Idea after idea went through my head. However, each was rejected for many reasons I forgotten by now. Out of ideas, my mind wandered back to the nympho-drops I had in my pocket. Suddenly, an idea clicked on in my head with the brightness of an atomic blast..
"I got it!" I shouted, breaking the silence of the room.
All of us were gathered at the breakfast table, eating the delightful meal Rita had made for us. It was just as tasty as her dinner. However, unlike dinner, this meal had an additional treat: Rita's nightgown. I tried to keep eating as well as I did the previous night. Finally, my mind was unable to push the image of Rita in said nightgown out of my mind.
"Excuse me, Rita?" I said.
"Yes, Oddley?" she replied.
"Can I say something?" I asked.
"Go right ahead." she said.
"Okay. What is with you and that nightgown?" I then asked.
"Is there somthing bothering you about my nightgown?" she asked me.
"The fact that the way the sunlight is hitting it, you might as well not be wearing it. That's what bothering about it." I said.
"I happen to like that nightgown." said Ogden.
"That's understandable from you. What about you, Wanda Lee?" I said.
"I think... it's a little too revealing for my tastes." she replied.
"Wanda Lee, I think your style needs help there." said Rita.
"What do you mean?" she asked.
"I mean, that outfit there just says housewife to me." said Rita.
"I am a housewife." said Wanda Lee.
"I thought the point of your little trip here was to find yourself." I said.
"It is. However, I wouldn't be caught dead in that thing." she said.
"Let's just drop it." said Ogden.
"You know, Rita, I think you have a nice... shade of skin." I said.
"For a moment there, I thought you were gonna say chest." she said.
"That's a nice part of her." said Ogden.
"I think I'll just stay quiet and eat my breakfast." I said.
And quiet I stayed. Breakfast was finished and Rita was quick to run off to the bedroom to get changed for the day. I still couldn't believe that Rita would go to school in Lisa's stead and no one would notice the change. I guess when you can pass yourself off as someone else when you "are" someone else half the time, you can pull it off.
It took five minutes between the end of breakfast and the time Rita returned downstairs. When she came down stairs, we all gathered at the bottom. As I looked, the outfit she had on wasn't different from the one she wore yesterday. It was another red turtleneck. However, this one had a nice dark blue skirt and same color fringe vest. The only thing that the same for Lisa was the turtleneck.
"Wait a minute, I thought you said you dressed like Lisa when you went to teach." I said to her.
"I do. The only thing different is the vest here. I think it makes this thing stylish." she replied.
"Have a nice day teaching." I said as Rita walking to the door.
"Have a good day, honey." said Ogden as he followed behind.
"Same to you, my darling companion." she said as she reached the door.
"A kiss, my dear?" he asked.
"Of course." she said, giving him one.
"See you this afternoon." he said as she opened the door.
"Same here." she said as she walked out and closed the door behind her.
"Now what?" asked Wanda Lee.
"That's a good question." I said.
"I usually just sit around all day." said Ogden.
"You mean you've been here for a week and you haven't gotten a job yet?" I said with confusion.
"I can't risk that farmer finding me. He probably has every farmer in the state looking for me." he said.
"I doubt that. Lisa must ask you to go find work." I said.
"She does. However, I don't see any point." he said.
"Why not?" I asked.
"Because Lisa and Rita bring in the money. Why should I be the breadwinner?" he said.
"After all those years, Susan's feminism finally gets to you." I said.
"Oddley, if you wanna do something else, you're welcomed to it." he said.
"Come, let us to the sofa to ponder our day's activities." I said, leading the way.
"While you guys think, I'm gonna go sit in the kitchen and think of something I can do." said Wanda Lee as she left the room.
Me and Ogden sat on the sofa for it seems like an eternity. Idea after idea went through my head. However, each was rejected for many reasons I forgotten by now. Out of ideas, my mind wandered back to the nympho-drops I had in my pocket. Suddenly, an idea clicked on in my head with the brightness of an atomic blast..
"I got it!" I shouted, breaking the silence of the room.
What is Oddley's idea? What does the nympho-drops have to do with it? As usual, the answer lies in next week's episode of "The Life of Oddley". It's been a fine story so far but hold on tight as the story takes more turns than a confused taxi cab driver on a hot day. Well, I've run out of things to say this week, so I will conclude this week's posting with a riddle. When someone sneezes, we say "God bless you". When God sneezes, what does He say? Think about it.
Join us next week, won't you?
Yours truly, John Maxwell.
Your Fellow Traveler.
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