Good day, fellow travelers, and welcome to the sixth posting of volume three of the Blog. We continue our adventure in Hyperion with an unusual chapter, the story of a wish fulfillment that lets us see how we define ourselves this side of the 21st century.
We begin, as always, with a recap of the story. The story in question began with a birthday party. Specifically, one that Conrad held for his older sister Darlene. It was to celebrate her 30th birthday. However, Conrad's best friend Cy believes that Darlene is a human iceberg: cold, unfeeling, and emotionless.
Cy's prediction that Darlene would ruin the party turned out to be right. This also didn't sit well with Conrad's two invited guests: lone intern at Cy and Conrad's radio station WHYP Phil and Cy's live-in girlfriend Joanne. A few remarks towards Darlene by Cy served to end the party early, with Conrad blaming his friend for its failure.
Meanwhile, that night, Phil happens to meet up with a woman, crying her eyes out under a streetlight. The two ended up having a makeshift date at the local waterhole. This one makeshift turned into the beginnings of a romance, althought taking place at night. Also, Conrad begins to feel that something is happening to his sister when she fails to answer her phone at night.
Without going into a long drag about the events of the last two chapters, I'll say that you're caught up enough to proceed forward. This week's chapter of Life in Hyperion is titled " ...and a Mrs. Hartley to Come Home to" and it moves the story forward over a month to the beginning of December 2009. I hope this doesn't ruin it for you too much. Now, to the story...
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The morning sun rises over Hyperion this autumn day as Cy bikes his way to work as usual. The morning air is filled with that late fall chill that precedes winter in northern climes. The ground itself has a white look to it, from the overnight frost and not snow.
At the radio station itself, Conrad stands by the door, feeling the cold as he waits for Cy to arrive. The time is 7:30 am and the sun is just starting to peak over the horizon. Conrad keeps looking down at his watch as he waits. At last, Cy rolls up to the front entrance of the radio station.
“Good morning, Conrad.” says Cy.
“Good morning? You have the nerve to keep me waiting for 20 minutes?” says Conrad.
“Well, Conrad, it is cold outside.” says Cy.
“I know it's cold. That's why I am taking issue over this waiting.” says Conrad.
“You grew up in New York just like me. Why haven't you developed the thick skin for the cold?” says Cy.
“Because I didn't spend as time outdoors as you.” says Conrad.
“I loved riding my bike around the city. Just because you did it less than me doesn't give you any right to criticize me.” says Cy.
“It doesn't? You would think so.” says Conrad.
“You know, if you don't like the cold, why don't we go inside?” says Cy.
“Just park your bike.” says Conrad.
“Okay.” says Cy as he places his bike in the bike rack outside the radio station.
“I can't believe that you would bike in the cold.” says Conrad.
“Unlike you, I don't have a car and don't wish one.” says Cy as he walks away from the bike rack and toward the front door.
“You have a driver's license. I know you do.” says Conrad.
“Just in case I have to buy a car.” says Cy.
“I know that will never come up as long as you have that bike.” says Conrad as they enter the building.
“Happy now?” asks Cy as he closes the door.
“I do feel warm.” says Conrad.
“You should. You're wearing a big overcoat.” says Cy.
“It helped outside.” says Conrad.
“Now it's not.” says Cy.
“I'll take it off then.” says Conrad, who removes the overcoat to reveal a winter jacket.
“A winter jacket?” questions Cy.
“Oh, fine.” says Conrad as he removes the jacket to reveal his usual outfit.
“There, that wasn't so hard.” says Cy.
“Easy for you to say. You just have that woolen overcoat.” says Conrad as Cy removes the overcoat.
“That's all I need.” says Cy.
“Another article from your mother's wardrobe?” says Conrad.
“Conrad, I wish you would lay off about that.” says Cy.
“Why should I?” asks Conrad.
“Because I don't do that.” says Cy.
“You have pieces of it.” says Conrad.
“That was for Nanette, who was still alive when my mother drew up her will.” says Cy.
“So you say.” says Conrad.
“You're lucky you're my friend.” says Cy.
“Good.” says Conrad as he moves away from the front door.
“One of these days, you're gonna trust my judgment in matters.” says Cy as he gets underway.
“Like I don't now?” questions Conrad.
“There are many examples I can bring up.” says Cy.
“Please don't, for my sake.” says Conrad as they reach the green room door.
“Just remember, I can be right, even when I'm wrong.” says Cy.
“What an oxymoron.” says Conrad as he opens the door.
“Oh, Conrad, I feel once again the on-set of the winter doldrums.” says Cy as he and Conrad enter the green room.
“Good morning, guys.” says Phil, pouring himself some coffee.
“Good morning, Phil.” says Cy.
“Having a good morning?” asks Phil.
“Me, yes. Conrad, no.” says Cy.
“Leave me out of this.” says Conrad.
“I have good news. Me and Louise are gonna have another lunch together.” says Phil.
“That’s great.” says Cy.
“I can’t believe it. That makes the seventh so far.” says Phil.
“Me neither. You two are becoming quite the item now that your romance is a daytime one.” says Cy.
“Meanwhile, I’m beginning to notice that Darlene is disappearing lately.” says Conrad.
“Really?” asks Cy.
“It’s beginning to worry me.” says Conrad.
“Don’t let it. I’m sure that all Darlene is doing is going somewhere to think things over.” says Cy.
“That’s what you keep telling me. Are you sure?” says Conrad.
“Conrad, Darlene has done a lot in her life that requires a second look. I’m sure the process is taking a while because of her iceberg nature.” says Cy.
“Why’s that?” asks Phil.
“Because, being an iceberg, she hasn’t the ability to think in emotional terms.” says Cy.
“Cy, I’m sure my sister can think in emotional terms.” says Conrad.
“You’re not sure, so am I. So, my theory stands.” says Cy.
“Back to me.” says Phil.
“Go ahead, Phil.” says Cy as Conrad steps up to the green room pinball machine.
“Cy, I think me and Louise are meant for each other.” says Phil.
“What makes you say that?” asks Cy.
“I don’t know. It’s just that I feel something when I’m with her.” says Phil.
“Is that true?” says Cy.
“I think the two of us have a future together.” says Phil.
“You think so?” asks Cy.
“I do.” says Phil.
“It’s been a month and a half since you two started dating. I guess you two are, in fact, now a couple.” says Cy.
“That’s right.” says Phil.
“I hope you can make a good life out of it.” says Cy.
“I just wish I had your life.” says Phil.
“My life?” says Cy.
“Yes, yours. I mean, your life is perfect.” says Phil.
“How is it perfect?” asks Conrad.
“Cy, you work a small amount of the day and earn big money.” says Phil.
“That’s perfect?” says Cy.
“Perfect to me. I mean, I’ll be lucky to have your life.” says Phil.
“I guess you could say that my life is perfect.” says Cy.
“Then I’ll say it.” says Phil.
“But then again, my life isn’t that perfect.” says Cy.
“How’s that?” asks Phil.
“It’s not a complete perfect life.” says Cy.
“How so?” asks Phil.
“Well, I might as well tell you.” says Cy.
“Here we go.” says Conrad.
“You know, I think in the terms of television, being the child of actors who worked in that medium.” says Cy.
“Go on.” says Phil.
“Since I was a little boy, watching reruns, I’ve had my vision of the perfect life.” says Cy.
“What was it?” asks Phil.
“It was three things I considered to be the perfect things for the perfect life.” says Cy.
“What were they?” asks Phil.
“It was, one: to have an interesting job where I’d met interesting people.” says Cy.
“You have that. I know it.” says Cy.
“Two: to work alongside my best friend through thick and thin.” says Cy.
“I guess I’m part of Cy’s perfect life.” says Conrad.
“But this is the one thing to elude me. Three: to have a Mrs. Hartley-type marriage.” says Cy.
“Who’s Mrs. Hartley?” asks Phil.
“The wife from The Bob Newhart Show.” says Cy.
“I still don’t get it.” says Phil.
“I can still picture that title sequence, where Dr. Hartley would make his way home. You would see Mrs. Hartley, standing at the window, looking for her husband.” says Cy.
“I remember that, too.” says Conrad.
“To me, to have a loving wife who’d always look for you when you got home is the final piece of a perfect life.” says Cy.
“And since Cy can’t ever settle for two outta three… “ says Conrad.
“Don’t you have Joanne?” asks Phil.
“But she works all during the day. I only work mornings. So, I always go home to an empty house.” says Cy.
“So, you’ve never had a moment like the one you want?” asks Phil.
“Never. I tried many times with Nanette but she could never get it right.” says Cy.
“So, why don’t you try it with Joanne?” says Phil.
“How can I? I can’t just ask Joanne to come home in the middle of the day to greet me home.” says Cy.
“Maybe you could still try it.” says Phil.
“You think I should?” asks Cy.
“Sure. I mean, I heard you say when you walked in here you were suffering from the winter doldrums. Maybe this will help you over them, for a while.” says Phil.
“I think Louise is a great help to you, for you can come with a gem of an idea now.” says Cy.
“It’s not all her help.” says Phil.
“I will finally have the perfect life, all three things.” says Cy.
“I have a problem with that.” says Conrad.
“Which is?” asks Cy.
“How are you going to get that third thing?” asks Conrad.
“Simple, I will stay away from home until her quitting time.” says Cy.
“What is that?” asks Phil.
“4:00 pm, if no student is kept after.” says Cy.
“So, you’re going home at 5:00 pm?” asks Phil.
“That’s a great idea. I’ll have a 9:00-to-5:00 job at last.” says Cy.
“Good luck with that.” says Conrad.
“Now, I must find a way to enact this.” says Cy.
“What can you do?” asks Phil.
“I think I’ll go to the library and hid out until quitting time.” says Cy.
“What’ll you do there?” asks Conrad.
“I think I’ll reread Murder on the Orient Express.” says Cy.
“Reread it?” asks Phil.
“It’s one of my favorite books. I love mysteries.” says Cy.
“That he does.” says Conrad.
A couple of hours later, Cy is walking into the library with quiet steps, as usual. He then begins a scan of the shelves containing the mystery books. Quickly, he spies the one he wants and takes it off the shelf.
He then finds his way to a table and sit down. As he begins reading, he is unaware of Darlene’s arrival behind him. She watches silently for a few moments before she decides to speak.
“Reading that again?” asks Darlene.
“Hello, Darlene. Nice to see you.” says Cy.
“Why are you here today, Cyrus?” asks Darlene.
“Hiding out.” says Cy.
“Cyrus, I have no problem contacting the police if you have committed any crime.” says Darlene.
”Thanks for telling me not to trust you if I ever get charged with a crime. However, I’m hiding out from my house.” says Cy.
“What has your house done to you?” asks Darlene.
“I’m doing something important.” says Cy.
“Nothing is important with you.” says Darlene.
“You call living out a fantasy not important?” asks Cy.
“Yes, I do, Cyrus.” says Darlene.
“I think it is.” says Cy.
“Just what fantasy are you living out?” asks Darlene.
“My fantasy of a perfect life.” says Cy.
“Not that again.” says Darlene.
“I would like to know, once in my life, what it’s like to come home to a wife who waits for me by the window.” says Cy.
“For once in your life, you’re thinking correctly.” says Darlene.
“What do you mean?” asks Cy.
“I mean, you are realizing that the life you currently have is not a happy one. So, you seek to create a life more in line with your personality.” says Darlene.
“Translation, please.” says Cy.
“You want Joanne to be your wife and you to be her husband, simple as that.” says Darlene.
“I haven’t thought about it that way.” says Cy.
“Now you can. Moreover, your life will feel much better once you and Joanne are wed and her life is spend tending to your needs.” says Darlene.
“That sounds nice to me.” says Cy.
“I know it so. I hope to be that way myself one day.” says Darlene.
“Darlene, for the first time in my life, I thinking of you as a person.” says Cy.
“Thank you, Cyrus.” says Darlene.
“And the feeling’s gone.” says Cy to himself.
As the day goes on, Cy reads slowly, taking in every word of the story. The time ticks by on the grandfather clock in the middle of the library. Cy can hear its chimes upon the hour. Each hour, it chimes the hour with its unique tones.
Cy counts the chimes as they occur, not letting the activity distract from his reading. Eventually, the clock chimes 5:00 pm. Cy then closes his book and puts it down. He then gets up from his chair and makes his leave of the library.
As he leaves the library, he is watched by Darlene, who smiles a little as he leaves. Cy then takes his bike slowly home. He bikes around the town until he arrives in his own driveway. He then chains up the bike and heads up the front walk.
As he reaches the front walk, the look on his face is of happiness. He unlocks the door and opens it. As he steps inside, he puckers his lips and closes his eyes, waiting for his kiss. However, he doesn’t feel anything on them.
He then opens his eyes and sees no one. Confused, he looks around for Joanne. As he walks pass the answering machine, he sees the light is on. He turns the answering machine, which then tells him he has one message.
“Hello, Cy? Listen, I’m sorry but I have to work over a couple more hours today. I have some tests to grade. I’m sorry.” says the voice of Joanne in the message.
The look on Cy’s face then changes to disappointment as he snaps his fingers. He then walks over to his easy chair and sits on down. As he sits there, he fumes a little. A few minutes later, he hears the door open.
“Where are you, Cy?” asks Joanne.
“Hello, my darling.” says Cy, dejected.
“What with you today? I tried reaching you but you didn’t answer so I left a message.” says Joanne, walking into the living room.
“I got your message.” says Cy.
“I’m sorry, but the other fourth grade teacher had to rush home and I had to grade some of his papers and leave them on his desk. I just couldn’t get away.” says Joanne.
“So you say.” says Cy, still dejected.
“Cy, what’s wrong with you?” asks Joanne.
“Wrong with me? Nothing is.” says Cy.
“You’re acting like I did something terrible to you.” says Joanne.
“You never did to me.” says Cy.
“It sounds like it by the tone of your voice and the way you’re acting.” says Joanne.
“Then I’ll change my tone and method of acting.” says Cy.
“For being the son of actors, you can’t often act different than you feel.” says Joanne.
“Many actors have that problem.” says Cy.
“But not your parents.” says Joanne.
“I never said that.” says Cy.
“Anyway, I hope you’re feeling better now.” says Joanne.
“A little.” says Cy.
“Good, now you need to go make dinner. I’m too tired.” says Joanne.
“Yes, dear.” says Cy, getting out of his chair.
Later that day, as the sun is halfway down the horizon, Phil is entering his home. As Phil looks at the inside of his house, he feels some measure of loneliness. The walls echo with his footsteps. As he walks to a chair, he passes a picture of a girl. He stops in front of it. He looks down at it and sighs heavily.
"I wish." says Phil, as if a command to some imaginary genie.
He moves on and reaches his chair. As he sits down, he plucks the remote off a small table next to the chair. When he finally gets sit down, he holds the remote up and turns on the TV. The TV comes on and plays the late afternoon shows on the local station.
A few minutes into watching, he hears a knock at the door. He walks to the door and opens it to find the figure of Louise standing in the doorway looking longingly back at the intern.
“Phil, my darling companion. Nice to see you today.” says Louise.
“What are you doing here, Louise?” asks Phil.
“I could ask the same of you.” says Louise.
“I decided to knock off early.” says Phil.
“Same here. I just had to see you. I thought I would surprise you until I saw your car out there.” says Louise as she steps inside the house.
“Well, here I am.” says Phil as he closes the door.
“That I can see.” says Louise.
“So, now what?” asks Phil.
“Whatever. I’m all yours. I’m an empty slate.” says Louise.
“Maybe we can watch some TV together.” says Phil.
“That sounds nice.” says Louise as she passes Phil's picture of a girl.
Louise picks up the picture and looks at it as Phil walks over to her.
"Who's the girl?" asks Louise.
"That's Evangeline." says Phil.
"Evangeline, Evangeline, curses the soul of the Mississippi queen." says Louise, quoting an old song.
"She was a nice girl." says Phil.
"Was? What happened?" says Louise.
"She died in a car accident senior year with her boyfriend." says Phil.
"This display of her picture would indicate that you had feelings for her." says Louise
. "I did. I admired her from afar and I tried to make her mine but she fell for another and when she died, I attended her funeral." says Phil.
“So there was a love before me.” says Louise.
“That there was. It was one-sided, though.” says Phil.
“Well, I guess I’m the second love of your life, and this time, I return your affection.” says Louise.
“And I’m grateful for that.” says Phil.
“As am I.” says Louise as she sits down in Phil’s easy chair.
“So, what do you wish to watch?” asks Phil.
“You, right now.” says Louise.
“C’mon, I mean it, what do you wanna watch on TV?” says Phil.
“Well, seeing how the news is almost on, how about that?” asks Louise.
“Why the news?” asks Phil as he sits down next to Louise on the easy chair.
“Because I’d like to know what’s going on in the world. It’s rare that I find out stuff like that.” says Louise.
“Suit yourself.” says Phil.
“Fine.” says Louise.
“I wonder what happened in the world today.” says Phil.
“That’s why we have the news.” says Louise.
“You know, that sounds like something Cy would say his mother said to him.” says Phil.
“That guy gets mentions even when the conversation isn’t about him.” says Louise.
“That reminds me of something he said he was gonna do today.” says Phil.
“What was it?” asks Louise.
“He said he was gonna live out one of his greatest fantasies.” says Phil.
“Did he say what it was?” asks Louise.
“He did. He was gonna try to come home to ’a loving wife who’d always look for you when you got home’ to quote him.” says Phil.
“Is that what he considers a fantasy?” says Louise.
“Well, it’s part of his vision of a perfect life. One of three, actually.” says Phil.
“What were the other two?” asks Louise.
“According to him, the first one was to work at an interesting place where he’d met interesting people. I guess he feels WHYP fits that to a tee.” says Phil.
“And the second one?” says Louise.
“The second one was to work by his best friend through thick and thin. Conrad is always there with Cy, despite some of the things he does.” says Phil.
“That’s what Cy means by thick and thin. Cy really has an idea what a good life to live is.” says Louise.
“You really think so?” asks Phil.
“I do. Cy has listed what he thinks are the perfect things one needs for a perfect life. He’s also found a way to live out two of them.” says Louise.
“Now he wants that third thing.” says Phil.
“Say, why don’t we do that?” says Louise.
“Do what?” asks Phil.
“Try to live out Cy’s vision of a perfect life.” says Louise.
“Why should we do that?” says Phil.
“Because it would be nice to see if those things would work for anyone else besides Cy.” says Louise.
“I guess it would be nice.” says Phil.
“So, where do we start?” says Louise.
“I don’t know. You decide.” says Phil.
“Why don’t try the thing Cy’s doing now?” asks Louise.
“You mean try to come home to a loving wife who’d waits for him?” says Phil.
“Yes, let’s try that. It’ll be fun.” says Louise.
“I guess we could try that.” says Phil.
“Let’s try it tomorrow. I’ll be here.” says Louise.
“Let me give you a key first. I always keep a spare around.” says Phil.
“This will be great.” says Louise.
“Wait, when should I come home?” asks Phil.
“Why do you ask that?” asks Louise.
“Because my job doesn’t have fixed hours. I need to know what time to come home.” says Phil.
“Well, when is Cy going home?” asks Louise.
“He says at 5:00 pm.” says Phil.
“Then you come home at 6:00 pm, because I’m also gonna make you dinner.” says Louise.
“That’s not part of Cy’s vision.” says Phil.
“I know. I’m making my own additions to it.” says Louise.
“If you insist. Besides, it would nice to have a home-cooked meal that I didn’t make. My cooking skills limit what I can eat.” says Phil.
“I think I can make you something different.” says Louise as she plants a quick kiss on Phil.
The next day, Cy walks his way into the green room. His mood is a little less than happy. This activity is noticed by Phil, taking a sip of coffee.
“Good morning, Cy.” says Phil.
“What’s so good about it?” asks Cy.
“I take it you’re not happy today.” says Phil.
“That I am.” says Cy.
“What happened to you yesterday? Did you get your fantasy?” asks Phil.
“You’re like that guy who greets the plane coming from Fantasy Island. It didn’t go well.” says Cy.
“What happened?” asks Phil.
“I hid out at the library, where Darlene told me I was doing the right thing. Then, I go home and I find it empty.” says Cy.
“Where was Joanne?” asks Phil.
“She had to grade a few more papers and stayed over at school.” says Cy.
“You must feel bad.” says Phil.
“You don’t know the half of it. I was expecting a kiss. Instead, I got nothing.” says Cy.
“Well, are you gonna try again?” asks Phil.
“That I am.” says Cy.
“Good morning, people.” says Conrad, entering the room.
“Hello, Conrad. Are you having a better morning than Cy?” says Phil.
“I think I am. I think Darlene might have disappeared again.” says Conrad.
“Did you try to call her again?” asks Cy.
“No. I just have a feeling.” says Conrad.
“You’re getting a feeling now for this?” asks Cy.
“I think I am, Cy. I just feel inside me that Darlene has vanished again.” says Conrad.
“Well, maybe you’re right but maybe you’re wrong.” says Cy.
“I don’t know about that, Cy.” says Conrad.
“Conrad, trust me when I say there’s nothing wrong with Darlene… that isn’t her personality.” says Cy.
“Say, how did your little thing work out?” asks Conrad.
“It didn’t. Joanne had to stay over at school and I missed my chance.” says Cy.
“Knowing you, you’re gonna try again.” says Conrad.
“That’s right, Conrad.” says Cy.
“I hope it works this time.” says Phil.
“Me, too.” says Cy.
“I hope you know what you’re doing.” says Conrad.
“So do I.” says Cy.
“Say, me and Louise have decided to follow your example.” says Phil.
“What example?” asks Cy.
“Your example of a perfect life.” says Phil.
“That example. What thing are you gonna try first?” says Cy.
“The thing you’re doing today.” says Phil.
“I hope I have the same luck as you.” says Cy.
A couple of hours later, Cy is walking back into the library, again with quiet steps. He makes his way over to the shelves with the science fiction books and scans once more. He finds the book of his choice. He then finds a table and sits on down. As with last time, he reads every word carefully, taking it in.
A few pages in, he feels something on his back. It is a pair of fingers walking up toward his shoulder. The fingers stop when they get to the shoulder. Cy looks up from his book at the fingers, then looks up at their owner. He soon finds himself staring at the face of Louise, smiling as she looks down at Cy.
“Hello, Cy.” says Louise.
“Hello, Louise. What’s with this?” asks Cy.
“I just wanna know what you’re reading.” says Louise.
“I’m reading one of my favorite books, Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury.” says Cy.
“Really?” says Louise, as she sits down next to Cy.
“It is. I just love science fiction. The wonder of them.” says Cy.
“What’s wonderful about them?” asks Louise.
“Just the ideas. The discovery of new things, talking to beings from other planets, traveling to distant stars. Each page is a journey to discovering the true nature of the universe.” says Cy.
“That sounds interesting.” says Louise.
“I’ve read this book many, many times, and I’m still in awe every time I read it.” says Cy.
“You must love reading that much to read a book over and over again.” says Louise.
“I see you have a book in your hands.” says Cy, noticing it in Louise’s hand.
“It’s just something I pulled off the shelf.” says Louise.
“What Are Sisters For? Sounds like something my mother would have said.” says Cy.
“Really? Sounds interesting to me.” says Louise.
“My mother was once called America’s Kid Sister because that was her thing during her short but sweet career.” says Cy.
“Was she?” says Louise.
“She was Mary Hartman’s sister and Angie’s sister. She was everyone’s sister. She was even in a movie where she was only credited as ‘sister’.” says Cy.
“Well, I wish I had a sister.” says Louise.
“Do you have any siblings?” asks Cy.
“No, I’m an only child.” says Louise.
“Well, so am I, sort of.” says Cy.
“What do you mean, sort of?” asks Louise.
“I am the only child of my parents together. From my father, I have two half-siblings. If my mother’s second marriage had occurred, I would have a couple more half-siblings.” says Cy.
“So, you have half-siblings, not whole siblings.” says Louise.
“That’s right.” says Cy.
“So, you’re an only child half the time.” says Louise.
“That’s a nice way to say it.” says Cy.
“I know it is.” says Louise.
“Now, let me get back to my book.” says Cy.
“Then I’ll get to mine.” says Louise.
Cy and Louise then sit there reading. While Cy does his slow reading, Louise is reading at a normal speed, taking in the pages halfway. A half-hour later, Conrad enters the library. As he enters, he looks over the place.
He then starts walking among the shelves, weaving in and out of the aisles. As he exits one, he comes upon Cy and Louise reading their books. He also restarts his search but decides to stop and talk to them.
“Hello, you two.” says Conrad.
“Hello there, Conrad. What brings you here?” says Cy, looking up from his book, along with Louise.
“I’m here looking for Darlene.” says Conrad.
“Have you found her?” asks Cy.
“No, I haven’t. I’m afraid my feeling was right.” says Conrad.
“So you were right.” says Cy.
“Hello there.” says Louise.
“Hello… who is that?” says Conrad.
“This, my friend, is the girl Phil has been seeing these many weeks. Conrad, meet Louise Harold.” says Cy.
“Charmed.” says Louise, extending her hand.
“Same here.” says Conrad, taking it.
“I’ve been waiting to meet you for a while.” says Louise.
“You know, I’ve just met you but I feel I know you.” says Conrad.
“I know the feeling.” says Cy.
“I see you’re up to your fantasy again.” says Conrad.
“What fantasy?” asks Louise.
“It’s something that Cy wants to experience.” says Conrad.
“Not just something. It’s one of the things that I feel are part of a perfect life.” says Cy.
“Like what?” asks Louise.
“There are three things. One: to work in a place where I met interesting people. Two: to work alongside my best friend. Three: to come home to a loving wife who looks for me when I come home.” says Cy.
“How many of those things have you done?” asks Louise.
“Well, I work at a radio station, and Conrad here is my best friend and co-worker.” says Cy.
“So, the last one… “ says Louise.
“Is the one I haven’t done… yet.” says Cy.
“This is Cy’s second try.” says Conrad.
“When was the first try?” asks Louise.
“Yesterday.” says Conrad.
“What happened yesterday?” asks Louise.
“Joanne, that’s my girlfriend, she had to stay over at her job and wasn’t home when I got there.” says Cy.
“Why is this so important to you?” asks Louise.
“Because I realize that my life isn’t happy, that I seek to create a life more in line with my personality.” says Cy.
“That sounds a little weird.” says Louise.
“That’s because it came from Darlene.” says Cy.
“Who’s that?” asks Louise.
“Conrad’s sister. I call her the human iceberg. She also told me that I want to make Joanne my wife and me her husband.” says Cy.
“Cy, that’s a bit wrong to me.” says Louise.
“What do you mean by that?” asks Cy.
“From what Phil has told me, you seem to be quite the forward thinker. I mean, how you handled the thing with Mrs. Harris shows me that you think a few steps ahead than the rest of us.” says Louise.
“That’s true. I mean, I got that from my parents. They wouldn’t let me be a backwards person.” says Cy.
“And yet, this stuff about having a loving wife waiting for you to come home when you get there and what Darlene told you seem a bit backwards.” says Louise.
“It doesn’t seem backwards to me.” says Cy.
“Trust me. In that forward-thinking mind of yours, there’s that backwards piece of thinking that is this need for a wife to come home to, for it implies she has no job herself.” says Louise.
“I think I’m seeing what Louise is saying. You’re going after something that can’t exist.” says Conrad.
“A month ago, I would have never thought I’d have two shows on the air. A few years ago, I thought I would never find love again.” says Cy.
“What are you getting at?” asks Louise.
“I think I can make my vision of a perfect life come true with a little help.” says Cy.
“I still say that this fantasy of yours is as backwards as you can get for a person with your mind.” says Louise.
“Same here.” says Conrad.
“I’m going to finish reading this book. Then, I’m gonna go home at 5:00 pm and have my fantasy realized. Then, I can get back to my life.” says Cy.
“I guess there’s no way to talk you out of it.” says Conrad.
“You’re right, Conrad.” says Cy.
“I’d better get back to my book, too.” says Louise.
“I’ll continue my search for Darlene.” says Conrad, walking away from the table as Cy and Louise return to their books.
The library clock again chimes off the hours. Each chime that goes off is heard by Cy with close ears. Meanwhile, Louise decides to leave the table and go elsewhere. All of this is unnoticed by Cy, who continues his slow reading.
Finally, the clock strikes 5:00 pm. Cy repeats what he did yesterday and leaves the library. His bike ride home is over the same path as yesterday. At last, he arrives in his own driveway. This time, he spies Joanne’s car in it.
As he chains up his bike, his mind set slips into his fantasy. He’s a man returning home from his tough but interesting job. He walks slowly up the front walk. He manages to spy the figure of Joanne in the window, the way he’d always pictured it.
He gets up to the front door and unlocks it. Slowly, he opens the door as his mind becomes entangled in the fantasy playing within it. He sees Joanne, standing before him. He imagines her arms open. Quickly, he decides to speak the most clichéd line ever written by a television writer.
“Hi, honey, I’m home.” says Cy, who then puckers up and closes his eyes for his kiss once more.
“Don’t get me that.” says Joanne in a less than happy tone.
“What?” asks Cy as he opens up his eyes.
“Don’t give me that innocent routine. Just where were you now?” says Joanne.
“But, honey… “ says Cy, the pucker going out of his lips.
“Don’t ‘honey’ me. Where have you been? I mean, I get here from work, expecting to find you and I find an empty home. You know how that makes me feel?” says Joanne, furious.
“I think so.” says Cy.
“I always count on you being here when I get home. Today, I come home and find nothing. Then, you just waltz through that door and give me that line and expect me to kiss you?” says Joanne.
“I think I’m getting what everyone has been telling me these last two days.” says Cy.
“What on earth are you talking about, Cy?” asks Joanne.
“What I’m talking about is about the life I wish I had.” says Cy.
“Cy, you’re talking riddles.” says Joanne.
“I’m not, Joanne. For the last two days, I have been trying to live out my idea of a perfect life. The least you can do is help me and try not to be mad at me for it.” says Cy.
“Cy, you usually make sense. Today, it’s been crazy and I was hoping I could come home and relax. You can’t do that for me?” says Joanne.
“Joanne, there are three things that I think are needed for a perfect: an interesting job, working with my best friend, and coming home to a loving wife.” says Cy.
“How can you say that when we’re not even married?” asks Joanne.
“I don’t know. I guess we’ve been living together so long, I just assumed you’d help me in my fantasy.” says Cy.
“Just what have you been doing?” asks Joanne.
“I’ve been trying for the last two days to come home to a loving wife who would wait for me when I got there and would kiss me when I walked through the door.” says Cy.
“Where did this come from?” asks Joanne.
“Ever since I was a kid, watching those old television shows my mother loved, I thought I could have the life I saw there. Now, I’m trying to find out what that would be like.” says Cy.
“Why didn’t you ask me to help you with this?” asks Joanne.
“I don’t know why I did. I guess I just thought… now what Louise said makes sense.” says Cy.
“What did Louise say to you?” asks Joanne.
“She said this fantasy was the most backward thing on my forward-thinking mind. The weird part is I let Darlene get to me.” says Cy.
“She actually got to you?” asks Joanne.
“She told me that I wanted you to be my wife and you my husband. Is that a backwards piece of thinking?” says Cy.
“It seems like that to me.” says Joanne.
“You know, I think I can still get my fantasy.” says Cy.
“How?” asks Joanne.
“You can help me.” says Cy.
“How can I help?” asks Joanne.
“Just been here at 5:00 pm tomorrow when I come home.” says Cy.
“Still want that fantasy?” asks Joanne.
“Yes, I do.” says Cy.
“Okay, I’ll been here, and I’ll be dressed in my best homemaker outfit.” says Joanne.
“I knew I could count on you.” says Cy.
An hour later, Phil is walking his way up to his front door. He gulps a little as he remember who is on the other side of the door. He slowly turns the knob and opens the door. The door opens to the sight of Louise dressed as a late 1960s housewife, smiling at him.
“Welcome home, honey.” says Louise as she throws her arms around him.
“It’s nice to be home.” says Phil as Louise gives him a big kiss.
“Tough day at work?” asks Louise.
“Just the usual.” says Phil.
“That’s nice, honey.” says Louise as she releases Phil from her arms.
“Is this routine necessary?” asks Phil.
“I just felt like it. Do you like my duds?” says Louise.
“They look nice.” says Phil.
“I just made up the outfit and put it on. It’s my idea of housewife ware.” says Louise.
“Whatever you say. It just looks nice on you.” says Phil.
“Come into the kitchen. I have dinner ready.” says Louise as she guides Phil by the hand.
“I wonder what’s for dinner?” asks Phil.
“Just some steaks I got.” says Louise.
“Good enough for me.” says Phil.
“Now just take your seat and I’ll take mine.” says Louise as the two enter the kitchen and sit down at the dining table, all dressed up.
“I see you fixed up the table.” says Phil as he sits down.
“That I did. I did it all in the span of a few hours, shopping and all.” says Louise.
“That’s nice to know.” says Phil.
“You know, I ran into Cy today and we discussed his vision for a perfect life.” says Louise.
“Really? How did that go?” asks Phil.
“I found that Cy was running on a piece of backwards thinking.” says Louise.
“That’s a serious thing to accuse Cy of doing. You better know what you’re saying.” says Phil.
“I know. It turns out that Conrad’s sister had gotten to him a little.” says Louise.
“In what way?” asks Phil.
“By adding on to his vision in a backwards way. She told him that he wanted to make Joanne his wife and him her husband.” says Louise.
“That does sound a little backwards to me.” says Phil.
“Trust me, it is. Me and Conrad did try to set him straight but once Cy gets going on something… “ says Louise.
“That’s something I’ve learned about him. He’ll see something through to the end, even if he’s wrong. I remember Conrad telling me how he campaigned to get New York the Olympics, only to lose badly.” says Phil.
“At least he tried.” says Louise.
“Hey, if you’re so up in arms over Cy’s plan, how come you did this?” asks Phil.
“Because this is different. I wish to do this.” says Louise.
“What’s the difference?” asks Phil.
“The difference is that the both of us agreed to do this together and are carrying it out together. This is not your idea. It belongs to both of us.” says Louise.
“Now that there is a Cy idea.” says Phil.
“Maybe he’ll come with such a plan himself.” says Louise.
“Even if he’s ever in the wrong, he always admit his mistakes openly and honestly.” says Phil.
“I think that’s true.” says Louise.
“Wait, are we saying we’re better than Cy?” asks Phil.
“No, we’re not. Cy can be guilty of bad thinking the same as the rest of us. He’s only human.” says Louise.
“As he says, that’s good to know, good to know.” says Phil.
Later that evening, Phil is saying goodbye to Louise as she leaves his house in the dark.
“Shall we do this again?” asks Phil.
“Lets. How about tomorrow?” says Louise.
“That’ll be fine.” says Phil.
“See you later, my darling companion.” says Louise as she walks into the darkness.
The next day, Cy walks into the green room with a smile on his face. As he enters, his cheerful mood is noticed by Phil, drinking his coffee.
“Good morning, Cy. I see you’re happy.” says Phil.
“That I am, Phil.” says Cy.
“I guess you got your kiss from Joanne when you came home last night.” says Phil.
“No, I didn’t. The minute I walked through that door, she lit into me.” says Cy.
“What about?” asks Phil.
“About not being there when she got home.” says Cy.
“Did you explain yourself?” asks Phil.
“I did, and she actually wanted to help me.” says Cy.
“She did?” asks Phil.
“I just never asked her to help me, so we worked it out. Tonight, I get to go home to my fantasy.” says Cy.
“Nice to see that you get your wish.” says Phil.
A couple of hours later, Cy walks into the library, his head held high. As he has done for the last three days, he collects his book, finds a table, sits down, and begins reading. As he starts in on the finale of the book, Darlene walks over to him.
“Good morning, Cyrus. Still living your fantasy?” says Darlene.
“Nope, just about to live it.” says Cy.
“Have you made any effort?” asks Darlene.
“Yes, and all I need now is none of your help.” says Cy.
“But didn’t I… “ says Darlene.
“I can’t believe I actually listened to you. I would have done better listening to Barry for advice, and you know how much I hate Barry and his Boston ways.” says Cy.
“If I can be of any further help… “ says Darlene.
“The only help you can be to me is to go away for a long while.” says Cy.
“I am going to leave now.” says Darlene, walking away.
“What fool that mortal be!” says Cy.
Once more, the clock does its chimes. A few hours into his stay, Cy reaches the end of his book. He considers getting another but decides to just wait it out. Cy listens to the chimes by the hour. Finally, 5:00 pm chimes out and Cy makes his leave of the library.
In scenes seemingly out of a sitcom’s title sequence, Cy makes his bike ride home. Soon enough, Cy bikes his way into his driveway. Inside the home, Joanne looks out the window and sees Cy arrive. Cy chains his bike and then makes his way up the front walk.
Cy reaches the front door and unlocks it. As he opens the door, he sees Joanne, in her wifely best, with her arms wide open. Cy then closes his eyes and puckers his lips. Joanne then hugs Cy and plants a kiss on his lips the best she can.
“So this is what it feels like.” says Cy, opening his eyes.
“Don’t expect it every day.” says Joanne, breaking off the kiss.
“Only when we want it.” says Cy.
“Good enough for me.” says Joanne as she starts kissing Cy again.
An hour later, Phil is skipping his way up to his front door. Unlike yesterday, he opens the door and sees the figure of Louise, working away mixing something in a large bowl.
“Hello, Louise.” says Phil as he walks in.
“Hello to you, too, my darling companion.” says Louise as Phil quickly walks into the kitchen.
“Say, what’s for dinner?” asks Phil.
“A nice, juicy meatloaf.” says Louise.
“That’s great. I haven’t had meatloaf since I moved outta my parents’ place.” says Phil.
“Then I’m honored to bring this dish back to you. Say, how did Cy’s fantasy work out?” says Louise.
“Well, according to him, the minute he got home, he didn’t get a kiss but a rant.” says Phil.
“What over?” asks Louise.
“Over being home late.” says Phil.
“Did he explain why he did that?” asks Louise.
“He did and almost lost it.” says Phil.
“I hope he recovered.” says Louise.
“He did by coming to the same conclusion we did over the same thing.” says Phil.
“So we can learn from even Cy’s mistakes.” says Louise.
“That we can.” says Phil.
“Maybe one day, I’ll have a job to come home from before you, so we can that perfect life Cy talks about.” says Louise.
“I’ve been thinking about that. I wonder if that perfect life exists.” says Phil.
“That’s something I heard Conrad say. He thinks that the perfect life doesn’t exist.” says Louise.
“Is there such a think as a perfect life, where one’s wishes, fantasies, and desires are all met?” asks Phil.
“I don’t know, but we can try to find it.” says Louise.
“Cy once told me something his mother said that I think is important to remember.” says Phil.
“What did she tell him?” asks Louise.
“She told him, ‘perfection doesn’t exist, so don’t go looking for it.’.” says Phil.
“Words to live by.” says Louise.
Monday morning, Cy walks into the green room, each step filled with confidence. Phil notices Cy’s walk as he enters the green room.
“Hello, Phil.” says Cy.
“Hello, Cy. I see you got your kiss on Friday.” says Phil.
“I did. In fact, me and Joanne have spent the whole weekend doing it over and over again.” says Cy.
“You two know how to have a good time.” says Phil.
“Phil, it’s a wonderful feeling to share your life with someone you love.” says Cy.
“Maybe your vision for a perfect life should be my goal with my relationship with Louise.” says Phil.
“Speaking of Louise, when’s your next date, if you have one?” says Cy.
“Believe it or not, me and Louise have a lunchtime date today.” says Phil.
“Good for you. You two are becoming like me and Joanne.” says Cy.
“That is what I call a complement.” says Phil.
“Hello, guys.” says Conrad, walking into the room.
“Conrad! How are you today?” says Cy.
“Not so good. I just found out that Darlene is disappeared again.” says Conrad.
“I’m sure it’s nothing.” says Cy.
“I just get this feeling that Darlene is somewhere else but I don’t know where.” says Conrad.
“I hope you can find her.” says Cy.
Just then, the phone rings. Cy rushes over to the green room phone and picks it up, leaving Phil and Conrad talking.
“Hey, Conrad, me and Louise have a lunchtime date today.” says Phil.
“Good for you two.” says Conrad.
“I’m beginning to think that the two of us are meant to be together. I just have that feeling.” says Phil.
“I’ve met Louise. I get a feeling, too.” says Conrad.
“Is it the one that Cy gets from her?” asks Phil.
“The same.” says Conrad.
“I’ll have to ask her why you and Cy get that feeling that you know her from somewhere.” says Phil.
“I wish you would.” says Conrad.
“It doesn’t seem to get to Cy much.” says Phil.
“What does?” says Conrad as Cy hangs up the phone.
“Guys, I just had a most interesting phone conversation.” says Cy.
“With who?” asks Conrad.
Who was that phone call from? Will it have any affect on the next chapter? If you call causing Cy to something that could cost him his job a simple affect. To see how all of that goes down, back to the Blog as we offer the first of two postings next week.
The first one, the seventh posting of volume three, will be Chapter IV of Life in Hyperion, titled "The Radio-a-Thon Siege", where Cy finds how hard it is to be charitable at Christmastime, especially if you're trying to honor a promise you made.. That's Monday, October 29th, at 5:00 pm.
The second one, the eighth posting of volume three, is a tale written for Halloween. It's a short story titled "The Werewolf and I". It's a fun yarn about a high school student who finds that one of his friends is a werewolf and decides that his friend shouldn't hide who he is from the world. That's on Wednesday, October 31st, at 5:00 pm.
Join me, won't you?
Yours truly, John Maxwell.
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